Boppa Advance Copy
Advance Reviewer's Copy
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(“Echoes” of the illustrations along the centerline between pages do not appear in the printed book.)
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for July 31 release
Boppa's Bald Stories
"Boppa," asked EmmyJean yet again, "Tell us how you got bald." And Boppa explained it again, differently and even more crazy than last time, and swore it was all true.
It was lightning! It was a bear! A shark, a tornado, a man with a very small lawnmower…. When the kids ask their granddad yet again, “Boppa, how did you get bald?” he answers with a different wild story every time, and swears they’re all true. Boppa’s wife “Yaya” is the author, Laurie Trott Rettig. She gathered Boppa’s stories and the moments of home and belonging that surround their telling. She asked Hanna du Plessis to capture the mix of kids, grandparents, and magical imagination in her wonderful illustrations. Written for young readers, each story and illustration offers a world of love and whimsy.
What readers are saying
The stories
Click to read "Boppa and the Green Hair"
Laurie Trott Rettig, author
Throughout her life in Montana wheat country, Laurie Trott Rettig has created places of home, creativity, generosity and whimsy. She has four grown daughters and one son, with an ever-expanding number of grandchildren. The Lark and Laurel House, which was a bed and breakfast, is now a whirl of life and playful exploration: music, games, food, spontaneous theater, backyard concerts, and a steady flow of guests. It was from this swirling life that the Boppa stories were born.
Laurie was raised and schooled in central Montana. She attended the University of Montana in Missoula and Montana State University, completing a BS in Home Economics and elementary education.
She spent time in Japan, England, and Spain before returning to her beloved prairie. There she took turns at being a farm wife, a teacher for the Quatre Fleurs home school, a public school teacher and later a teacher of English in South Korea.
In 2010 Laurie achieved her dream of becoming a bed and breakfast owner. That same year she achieved another long-cherished dream when she became the wife and partner to the man who loves her. She knows him as “Ross the Boss,” but he is known to the grandchildren as “Boppa.”
Through it all, Laurie has exercised her gift for creating alluring spaces for intimacy, connection and relationship.
Hanna du Plessis, illustrator
Hanna du Plessis illustrated her first children’s story when she was in her early twenties. Through the following years she’s never stopped sketching, painting, and creating expressions of wonder and the full range of human emotions. She’s worked as an architect, a designer, a teacher, a dancer. Born under apartheid in South Africa, then living in the US, she has dedicated her life to collaboration toward equitable and sustainable life for all.
Hanna met Yaya and Boppa and the roiling rest of the family a decade ago. Laurie showed her the bald stories, the two laughed and imagined together, and here we are.
In December of 2023, Hanna was diagnosed with ALS. This is a progressive neuro-muscular disease, and Hanna’s hands became too paralyzed to paint. That’s why the illustration for one of the stories in the book is still a sketch. Now in 2024, Hanna is choosing to use her energies in other ways, and offers that final sketch with love for Yaya, Boppa, the stories, and you.
You can learn more about her life, writing and art by visiting okaythen.net/voices/hanna-du-plessis.
Oppression and Sue
“How do I change the world? It’s a beautiful question. The only problem is that when I ask that question, I ask it with the same mind that raised me. If you were raised in an oppressive system, that culture lives inside you. I see it in myself and the people I work with—we want to bring a better future into the world, but we have inherited the tools of Oppression.”
We are thrilled to be in the process of bringing you Hanna du Plessis’ richly illustrated modern fable, Oppression and Sue. It’s easy to read, but points to a lifetime of practice for anyone who seeks to use their life in service to a life-sustaining future for us all.
In a few pages, Hanna uses a gardening metaphor to raise many profound questions. In developing this book, we hope to go beyond simply reproducing her text and illustrations. We want to make a tool. We’re asking ourselves,
“How can this book have a live beyond the bookshelf? How can it help leaders and groups host conversations that matter in their organizations and communities?”
True to Okay Then’s nature as a “participatory production company,” we are collaborating with some wonderful co-creators who will add perspective, stories, questions, facilitation guides, and activities for anyone who wants to use Hanna’s book in their world, with their people.
Sample pages
Video: CareForce at the Variety Show
CareForce on stage at the Polish Hill Variety Show
Dear folks, we’re aware we haven’t updated you since mid-May. This is short—the main thing is, we wanted to show you a video!
Briefly,
– Hanna’s symptoms continue to progress, with corresponding upping-of-attention to her movement, balance, and overall care.
– Hanna continues to write, using a Tobii-Dynavox gaze-tracking device. Like most of the gear designed to support people in her situation, it’s both wonderful and infuriating. Hello, learning curve.
– We have regular help from two paid caregivers
– We are acquiring a used wheelchair-accessible van, for a price that really amounts to it being a gift.
– The major themes beyond basic care: end of life planning, hunger for continued connection to friends and family, creative voice (Hanna was just the guest on a podcast; more about when it’s published), spiritual life and fulfillment through this wild mix of loss, vitality and community.
Now…. On to the show.
Thanks to Mark Knobil for shooting, editing and posting the video.
Departing Royalty
by Marc Rettig
for the Kenyon Creative Nonfiction Workshop
“We must risk delight. …We must have the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless furnace of this world.”
Jack Gilbert, A brief for the defense
First I need to tell you about the life that’s being stolen.
It’s a block and a half from my house to Hanna’s, and we both know the neighbors along the way. Especially Hanna, who made that walk twice a day for a decade. It’s a five-minute walk, but Hanna often took half an hour. She carried old cards from a library card catalog. She’d say, “Oh, look at you, you’ve grown so much!” to a magnolia bud, a baby pine cone, a weed in the sidewalk crack, then pull out one of those cards and carefully sketch its portrait on the back.
Hanna gave the same attention to the neighbors, keeping sketches of their lives in her mental card catalog. “How was your daughter’s trip?” “What did the doctor say?” “Is that a new blouse?”
Thirty minutes each way for ten years cultivates a lot of love.
ALS, that thief, has stolen those daily visits from Hanna, and from the neighbors. It’s a progressive disease that slowly unhitches nerves from muscles, degrading and stealing the body’s ability to speak, chew, put on a shirt, scratch an itch, walk down the street, sketch a bud. The thief took her voice. She writes slowly on an electronic slate. For all their love, people don’t know what to say to a dying woman, however wholeheartedly she is dying.
Now I can tell you about the photograph.
Hanna’s trip from her writing desk on the first floor to her nap on the second floor is a geography of loss. She moves from her wheelchair to the stair lift with the support of a walker. Each of those—chair, walker, and lift—were heartbreaking symbols on first meeting. Now she waves like departing royalty as the lift carries her up the stairs.
Arriving in the bathroom I lower her skirt and support her descent to the toilet. When she first needed that help and we knew she would need it for the rest of her life, her heart broke. Wailing tears and snot. Now she smiles at a safe soft landing on the seat. When she’s done I help her stand, and use tissues to dry her. We glance at each other in the mirror with amused shyness.
In the photograph. we’re using a bristly motorized mouthpiece that vibrates to brush all her teeth at once.
The first time we used the brush, Hanna yelled at me, and sobbed tears of frustration. You have to squeeze it just a little so it will fit in her mouth. We hadn’t learned that. The disease is infuriating, utterly, as are its necessary devices, methods, and mysteries. In that moment we were defeated.
Now light is pouring in the window and the air feels cool. We two friends are together. There will be games in the evening. The brush is humming. It all smells like mint.
I’ve just said something like, “I’m so glad for this edible carwash.” Hanna laughed, and that pushed foam out around her teeth, and that was funny too. And our laughter at the joke and the foam, that was funny, and the motor is vibrating and there’s foam in the sink, and we don’t have control, and…. And it’s all so delightful. There’s only joy in those crinkles at the corner of her eye.
In the midst of all we were living, the moment felt huge. I drew a great breath of delight. I let go of the brush and the walker, reached for my phone and took the picture.
In this moment we were collaborators in the practice of stubborn joy. The poet Jack Gilbert taught us that years ago after Hanna’s miscarriage. Hanna took the lead in walking into difficult country, learning to hold both light and dark through our days, learning to meet life as it is rather than as we want it to be. Loss and gladness, mine and yours, and the neighbors, the city’s, the world’s. That’s a lovely and difficult joy. Once in motion, it’s hard to knock off its tracks.
As is usually true for noble ideas, the practice is mundane. It’s a little noisy. It uses up a lot of tissues. But through that practice we may come to the place where we ascend with a smiling wave, like departing royalty, as are we all.
Bright Green Box (via Short Reads)
Hanna was just published in a literary magazine called Short Reads, which sends one highly curated short essay a week to its subscribers.
Here’s the link!
via 
Hanna du Plessis
“It’s not only my body that is dying. Think about so many other bodies—of people and places—you know it's a time of dying. As Vanessa Machado de Oliveira says, it’s a time of ‘hospicing modernity.’ Hospice like I'm giving someone a soft transition out of life. I believe it is our collective work to usher out this worldview of power-over, and bring in something more beautiful.”- Hanna du Plessis
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Hanna's first book: Bedsores and Bliss
Now available in print, eBook, and audiobook editions. “An inspiring, heart-opening read for anyone navigating life’s toughest challenges.”
Follow Hanna’s health and stories from her community of care at okaythen.net/hanna.
Hanna is our first featured voice...
…and she is dying of ALS.
Through her teaching, coaching, group hosting, writing, art, loving acts and lived example, Hanna has touched thousands of people. She’s a leader in showing what’s needed for us to create together a world where all belong. We are so excited to bring her voice to you.
A message from Hanna recorded in April 2023, a few months after her diagnosis
Launch Event! Live in Unraveling
Here’s the recording of our remarkable evening with eight writers, including Hanna, coming together around the themes of Hanna’s first book, Bedsores and Bliss: Finding fullness of life with a terminal diagnosis.
The reading featured excerpts from Hanna’s book, laced with guests’ writings in response to Hanna’s prompt:
“What feels terminal in the body? As things we once depended on unravel, die or disappear, when we are hurting, how do we keep going? How might we support each other as we lose what’s precious?”
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Hanna's story
Hanna’s career has revolved around an urgent sense of possibility—that we can become more able to co-create the thriving world we can dream of.
Beginnings in South Africa
Hanna grew up in apartheid South Africa, with a clear social caste system that still reverberates in inequitable practices that harm everyone. Living there, she witnessed how patterns of oppression perpetuate in our own bodies and in the social fabric, one generation after another.
Moving from design to social transformation
Around 2010, Hanna left the world of design and strategy to learn about social transformation. She embarked on a different mission: to transform herself and share what she learned with others, “so we can get good at the collective work of healing, repairing, and re-weaving.”
Hanna has co-hosted dozens of spaces of transformation—gatherings of change leaders, student cohorts, entire organizations. She has been an artist, a dancer, a writer, and performed improv on stage.
Hanna’s persistent driving question throughout these years has been:
“Seeing that the world is a living system, that we are all participants in its emergent complexity, and that oppression and trauma are embedded in our society, how do we create together toward an equitable and sustainable future?”
Living, dying and writing with ALS
In March of 2023, Hanna was diagnosed with ALS, a degenerative neuromuscular disease that slowly robs the body of its functions. She has committed this time to writing, and we are thrilled to have some of her work in development.
Learn more, learn how to help
Hanna’s community of care has a home at okaythen.net/hanna. You can see some of her past writings, follow her story through updates, and see ways we can all support her through this time.
Some past works
Hanna speaks at TEDx Pittsburgh
The desegregation of self
Toward ending white silence
Current and forthcoming work by Hanna
Choosing to See (Racial healing is possible)
A beautiful short film. Through the summer of 2025, Hanna wrote seven short pieces describing key moments in her arc from “nice white Afrikaans girl” to someone able to hold whole loving relationship across the boundaries of historical oppression. Erica Wessels, who voiced the audiobook of Hanna’s “Bedsores and Bliss,” graciously gave her talents to these new essays. Found footage and animations in the style of Hanna’s work provide rich visuals.
Bedsores and Bliss
Finding fullness of life with a terminal diagnosis—a pocketbook containing a remarkable collection of essays written as Hanna experienced her diagnosis and life with ALS.
Boppa’s Bald Stories
A children’s book featuring Hanna’s beautiful and whimsical illustrations. NOW AVAILABLE!
Singalong!
A singalong for Hanna's "May birthday"
After the gorgeous snowy serenade under Hanna’s balcony for her real birthday on the 17th of January, we decided the 17th of every month would be Hanna’s birthday.
Dear Mark Knobil captured some moments and shared them in a gallery. Thanks Mark!
Here’s the flyer with the original invitation
May 2024: Request for donations
6 May 2024
Hello dear folks,
This update is about money. So many of you have given, with so much generosity. We’ve been stewarding your gifts as best we can, and still have over 80% of your donations in reserve. But now Hanna’s needs have progressed in ways that require us to start spending. So we’re writing to let you know about the financial needs for Hanna’s care.
We are hiring paid caregivers
We aim to hire two people to cover 95 of the 168 hours in a week. Including fees and payroll tax, that comes to $9,700 per month. (Know someone who might be qualified and interested? Please send them our job description.)
We are arranging for a wheelchair-accessible van
Access to transportation is so important for Hanna. We’ve had intermittent access to a wheelchair-accessible van, which was so wonderfully helpful. We need one that she can use any time, and have found a place that offers three-month rentals. The cost for three months is $9500. We’ll start with that, then assess the value of extending another three.
How you can help
• One-time donation: use either of the buttons below to make a donation of any size (we’ve learned from your past generosity how small amounts add up to great help)
• Monthly donations are especially helpful, because knowing what’s coming helps us manage these monthly costs. Click “Monthly” at the top of the donation form to set a regular monthly amount.
For these two goals—consistent good care at the level Hanna requires, and reliable access to transportation—we are looking at $14,700 a month. For starters we’ve set a goal to raise three months funding at that level, or $45,000.
It’s not a crisis (yet)
Between the funds we started with and your donations over the last year, we can proceed with all of these plans right away. We don’t have to wait. The money we now request will allow us to keep going beyond what we’ve saved, hopefully without ever having a crisis that forces difficult and unwanted decisions.
We’ve set up a new fundraising campaign on GiveButter—chosen because it’s easy for you, easy for us, and we’ll spend little on transaction fees. Note the “one-time” and “monthly” options at the top of the donation form.
Quick donation shortcut
A quick pop-up form, if that’s all you need.
Big Picture
Great for seeing our progress and for sharing with others who might want to help.
A little more back story on care
Since December 1 of last year (when I started doing stats), 24 people have provided direct care to Hanna in her home. That doesn’t count many more who have helped organize, clean, feed, launder, entertain, manage, and more. These are people who have helped Hanna with her growing challenges of movement, rest, medication, pain management, nutrition, personal care, communication, travel,…. Every day and night, all day and night. One person has spent the equivalent of ten weeks “on the job.” Many have consistently shown up week after week. More still fill in gaps and come to assist as they are able, however they are able.
It’s an amazing effort. Hanna is SO GRATEFUL for this amazing community, as is everyone around her. What a community of caring, attending, doing whatever is needed through all these changing needs.
But the needs are exceeding our ability to care. Increasingly there are gaps in the schedule we must quickly fill. Hanna’s care is becoming more complicated and more medical. Many of us are doing respectable but amateur duty in physical therapy, medication, nutrition management, etc,. and because there are so many people helping it is difficult (impossible?) to have consistent knowledge and technique across everyone involved.
Hanna needs skilled, dedicated, loving care. Then we can all be there to support, help, and continue the flow of life with Hanna. That’s what this fundraising campaign is for.
Thank you all, as always, for your love and support. More updates soon on Hanna’s life, writing and publication, recent public events, and more.
Marc
Seeking a compassionate caregiver
March 2024
Hello,
Here in Pittsburgh we are looking for a compassionate caregiver with a gentle soul, to be part of Hanna’s fabric of care.
If the job description below sounds like you or someone you know that might be interested in climbing aboard this magnificent ship of care to accompany Hanna and the CareForce on this uncertain journey, please send an email to Erika Kestenberg at careforce@okaythen.net with the following information:
• A brief written note, voice note or video clip sharing why this position appeals to you.
• Your full contact information, including phone, email, and address.
• The date you’re available to start.
• A description of your past experiences working as a caregiver, or a resume if you have one you’d like us to see.
• Whether you have criminal background and child abuse clearances or need to acquire them. (If there are flags on your criminal background that are not relevant for this position, feel free to still apply and let’s talk about them).
Thank you! Share this link as you see fit, and/or download a PDF of the job description with the button below and pass that along.
Seeking a Compassionate Caregiver for Hanna du Plessis
Our CareForce is looking for a compassionate caregiver with a gentle soul for our special friend Hanna. (You can learn a lot about Hanna’s life, her ALS, and her care by visiting okaythen.net/hanna.)
CareForce is the name we gave our mighty group of friends currently caring for Hanna 24/7. Hanna has been contending with bulbar onset ALS for the last 15 months. She is living in the Polish Hill community of Pittsburgh. As an ideal candidate, you should have a diverse and progressive mindset, excel in understanding non-verbal communication, be patient, and have a deep capacity for empathy. Experience with ALS care is a plus, but not required.
Key qualifications include the physical ability to support 130 pounds, emotional resilience, and excellent listening skills. The role demands strict hygiene practices, including wearing masks and minimizing illness exposure. We value trustworthiness, reliability, a joyful spirit and the ability to work well in a team. An appreciation for a tidy living space, comfort with caregiving tasks, and openness to feedback are important. We are seeking a candidate who is adaptable, self-aware, and willing to engage in an honest dialogue about fit and changing needs.
Monday-Friday, 8am-3pm, $25/hour
Hanna is transitioning from being supported only by her CareForce friends 24/7 to also having paid caregivers. It is exhausting for Hanna, and increasingly dangerous for her, to adjust to a constant rotation of different caregivers. As her needs increase, we need reliable, consistent, and skillful support to help her live well while dying. She is looking for someone who can provide consistent work 35 hours per week, primarily Mondays to Fridays between 8:00 am and 3:00 pm, starting immediately. Consistent support is also needed on weekends and some overnights as well. At present we can offer $25 per hour. We are seeking dedicated caregivers who can stay engaged with Hanna and her CareForce for a 6-12 month commitment, in cooperation with skilled nursing and hospice workers as needed.
Compassionate Caregiver Qualifications
Prior caregiving experience needed. Ability to support moving a 130 pound person from sitting to standing to sitting, with laying down and sitting up in bed, etc. A current driver’s license, clean driving record, and car insurance are preferred, but not required. The ability to maintain transportation to and from Hanna’s home in Polish Hill.
Sample Daily Activities
• Preparation of meals for oral ingestion and the use of a PEG feeding tube (which is easy to learn)
• Assistance with bathing, grooming, oral care, and toileting.
• Lifting and assisting Hanna in and out of bed, a chair and from the toilet.
• Morning and afternoon stretching Hanna’s body
• Assistance in using mobility support devices (chair lift, wheelchairs, walkers, etc…)
• Supporting Hanna’s ability to communicate through a myriad of tools (laptop, boogie board writing tablet, signs, iPad, etc…)
• Assistance with medical equipment (bi-pap ventilator, humidifier, cough assist, suction).
• Support with schedules for Zoom appointments and appointments in and outside the home.
• Administration of medicine for pain management
• Maintaining records of medication, food and drink intake, and other information about Hanna’s condition.
• Movement and outdoor activities
• Light household cleaning
• Assistance opening and reading mail aloud
• Infusing joy, fun, and humor into everyday life as much as possible.
How to Apply
If this sounds like you and you are interested in climbing aboard this magnificent ship of care
to accompany Hanna and the CareForce on this uncertain journey, please send an email to
Erika Kestenberg at careforce@okaythen.net with the following information:
• A brief written note, voice note or video clip sharing why this position appeals to you.
• Your full contact information, including phone, email, and address.
• Date you’re available to start.
• A description of your past experiences working as a caregiver or if you have a resume you’d like to include.
• If you have criminal background and child abuse clearances or need to acquire them.
• (If there are flags on your criminal background that are not relevant for this position, feel free to still apply and let’s talk about them).